Finding My Groove
I’m home after twelve hours on campus, bug-eyed but exhilarated.
The holidays were lovely, but seriously? I was pretty fucking happy to get back in the swing of things. I love my family, but three weeks of non-stop togetherness is a bit much. And I don’t know why I was in such a hurry for Cakes to talk--most of the time she’s saying “no”, or “I want to watch Dora”. So, this morning I was awake before my alarm went off, at 6:00. I had breakfast, caught up on blogs and actually put on makeup before she even started stirring, and I was out the door by 7. I can’t get over what a change this is from my last few months in my old job in IT. I was so miserable with what I was doing, I would hit the snooze button four times every morning.
Now that I’m no longer intimidated, grad school is really fun. My course load is slightly lighter this term and all my classes are in one day (it’s a very long day, but it saves me shlepping to Jane and Finch). I just started a new class I’m really excited about called “Black Song”, about African-American poetry. We’re going to read lots of poems, and listen to music. And the prof is really excited about her subject (actually, all of my profs are—it’s so refreshing).
A couple of weeks ago, my program director asked me if I was going to apply for the PhD, and I did start to give it some more thought. I was tempted. It’s a pretty cosy place. I totally understand now why people stay in grad school for so long, even when they don’t have definite plans. But I just can’t justify it—I know I don’t want to be a professor. I wish there were something between MA and PhD. I’d love to do a second MA actually, in film studies or something, but I don’t think McHotty’s too thrilled about that idea.
Anyway, my thoughts about my future scholarship were confirmed today when I received my first piece of negative feedback:
This essay is impressive in its literary perception and fluent writing, but not sufficiently rigorous in its critical analysis and scholarship.
The truth hurts.
Actually, it didn’t really hurt. I know this. I know I’m much more interested in what I have to say than what others do.
I’ve decided my next move will be a publishing certificate program (probably Ryerson). A lot of it can be done online and there is an internship at the end. I’ve been thinking about this for a long time now, and I think it will be a good fit. So, if you have any advice for me, I welcome it!
Anyone else really happy to go back to work today?