The Routine Nazi
*Edited! Dance Commentary Below
***
I try to be, and I think I am, for the most part, a relaxed mama.
I let Cakes lead the way during the day, deciding what she wants to do. I try to strike a balance between outdoor activity, music, fine motor play, and reading. I try to represent each food group at every meal. But I don’t get too hung up on this stuff.
The one area where I am inflexible is Cakes’ routine. She goes for her nap at around 11 and to bed by 7. I will miss out on things I’d like to do rather than fuck with the routine.
You see, we have been blessed with a good sleeper and I don’t want to mess it up (dear sleep gods, please don’t punish me for daring to voice this aloud). Like I’ve said before, there are many days when I feel a great sense of relief when she goes to bed. Papa and I like to have a quiet, relaxed dinner and a glass of wine. When we want to be social, we invite someone over or go next-door. We waited a long time for our wee backyard so we’re happy to stay here and enjoy it.
Yet, reading Scarbie’s post the other day got me thinking, maybe I should lighten up. Maybe it wouldn’t be the end of the world if she goes to bed an hour or two later once in awhile. Maybe she’d actually sleep in! It would be nice to have the freedom to actually go out as a family after 7 pm.
Do I dare tickle the dragon? I don’t know if I’m brave enough.
Routine, poutine. Let's party.
***
Zoolander, The Musical
Dance was so good tonight.
The performance of the night, for me, was Tranji. Loved, loved, loved it.
I'm not going to pick a winner. Whenever I do, it's the kiss of death for the poor sucker. They're all fantastic.
Go, Benji, go!
Shit. Couldn't help it.
Labels: on motherhood
posted by metro mama @ 1:36 PM
17 Comments:
I've been feeling EXACTLY the same way, for exactly the same reasons. I read MfM's post and thought, "Wait! You mean, we don't have to observe the bedtime every single night?" I still can't quite get my head around it.
After reading Scarbie's post as well, we went out from about 2 to 5 came home for a quick bottle, and then out from 6 to 9 with no afternoon nap, I was prepared for a meltdown but surprisingly nothing happpened. We came home put Samantha to bed and that was it. I still think though that it was our one lucky day and we haven't done it since then. I would try it at least once. If you can give Cakes an afternoon nap she can probably stay up till 9. That's what I do with Samantha, it usually works. Sorry for the loooonnng post!
I've become more flexible with bedtime lately, and it hasn't affected Cordy too much. Some days she stays up until 8pm, while most days she's in bed by 7pm or 7:30 at the latest. Her naps are decided by when she looks tired, or is acting cranky, which is generally between 1-3pm.
But know this: if they go to bed later, they never sleep in. I wish it worked that way, but it doesn't.
I'm a sleep-routine nazi, too. Our good sleep habits are too hard-won for me to be interested in f***ing with them right now. She's down by 8, no matter what.
Maybe I'll lighten up in some months, but for now, I value the peace of these nights too highly.
Oooh, that's a hard one, by why not try it and see what happens. My little guy is also a good sleeper and when we've kept him up later than usual, he still sleeps fine, just wakes up a little later usually. Good luck!
P.S. What an adorable picture!
Ella's never been a good sleeper. Even with a strict 7pm bed time. And, fortunately, if she sleeps a little later, she actually wakes up a little later. That "little later" though is never past 8am. Well, she once woke up at 9am and I had to check her constantly to see if she was still breathing.
Now, we let her conk out anywhere between 8-9pm. Awful, I know. But, DH is on graveyard. If I put her to bed at 7pm, he'd never see her.
I do have a friend with a great little sleeper. She also has a strict sleep schedule. That works for her. This works for me.
You'll do what feels right.
i've always been pretty lax with bumblebee's schedule, and to my surprise, she evened it out herself and is now quite predictable.
when planning outings we try to work around naps, but we don't stress about it. i think that a nap in the car or stroller is still a nap.
i'm sure that on a particularly nice evening, if you guys want to go for a walk, that cakes wouldn't mind. so she'll start her snooze in the stroller. a little milk and a cuddle once home and you'll still be able to catch sytycd!
Kyle and I disagree on this point at times. I don't mind keeping her up on special occasions - such as when we are out visiting friends - as long as she's behaving well and not showing signs of tiredness. But I don't do it at home thinking that she'll sleep in. Never happens. If anything, she wakes up EARLIER than usual.
But they're all so different, maybe your little one will adapt quite well.
She is SO beautiful. LOVE that sweet little face! So envious you have a good sleeper!
lady, don't pick a winner here; it's just not appropriate.
we are on the exact same schedule
(except often 7pm has been more like 8)
I love that lulu naps from 11-1 it's such an awesome nap time
(especially for me to get stuff done like reading blogs..note the time)
I think there's nothing wrong with having a rigid schedule,
it makes things much more manageable.
we do tend to let it slide a couple times a week when we go out for dinner though.
I wanted to be a routine nazi but that didn't fly for my little guy. He made me relax and we found our groove. Now that he's older its less of a big deal but a routine ... oh how I long for a routine.
And .. go Benji go!
Well, you know how I feel about this one...HEIDI! I feel like Travis is a poor copy of Nick and Blake from last year. He's still really good, but he's no Blake or Nick. And, he lacks confidence--and this comes out in his dancing.
That Tranji routine was FAWESOME! (i.e., not just AWESOME...FAWESOME!)
Benji's aiight. I'd sooner see him win than Trav. He's great at what he does.
And, re. the routine: I'd say, yeah, tickle that dragon. It's good for you and good for Cakes!
By the way, I think your blog is fawesome. Love your writing. I'm adding you to my blogroll so I'm sure to return, and to give you props!!
And...Cakes is adorable! She looks around the same age as my monkey! They'd get along great....except for the fact that their naps conflict: the monkey naps at 2ish....
I am pretty much always snapping to the routine too because I think it's better for their sleep and gives a comforting pattern to their day. Wake at 7-ish, nap at 1-ish, bed at 8-ish. Some nights, if we are going to the in-laws for dinner or if Pumpkinpie and Misterpie come to pick me up at work on a late night, it may be 9, and that's okay once or twice a week, maybe, but on nights when she can sleep in if she wants and then back on the routine.
So set on the routine. Nap between 12:30 and 1, until 3. Yes, We wake him up if he wants to nap longer.
Bedtime is 7:30. Almost without exception.
My son is very high energy. This works for him.
(Oh, he rarely gets out of bed before 7 am. Usually it's around 7:30. Occasionally he'll sleep past 8. This makes life tolerable. Most days!)
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