metro mama

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

How Embarrassing

The other night in class, one of my colleagues was giving a presentation on a poem about the Middle Passage. It’s a brutal poem, and we were all appropriately sombre.

However, the speaker was rudely interrupted by a very loud Canadian ditty:

coo-roo-coo-coo-coo-coo-coo-coo!

coo-roo-coo-coo-coo-coo-coo-coo!

My friend sitting next to me frantically fumbled for his cell. It doesn’t get worse than that.

Actually, it does. When I saw Salt Water Moon a few weeks ago, a very quiet, two-person play, someone’s phone went off. Many of us turned and shot daggers at the culprit. He deserved to be singled out.

My embarrassing moment came yesterday. I was in one of my first meetings at work, sitting right next to a VP when my stomach started growling, deafeningly loud. I tried to do the strategically timed clearing of the throat trick to cover up the sound, but I don’t think it worked.

Cakes is embarrassing me a lot lately with her new favourite habit—picking her nose. We’ll be sitting on the bus, and I’ll see someone looking at her. At first I assume they’re admiring her beauty, until I see a frown forming. Sure enough, I look down and she’s playing with a big booger.

Anyone else having this problem? What do you do? Some people say to ignore it, but I just can’t! It’s so fucking gross!

P.S. Did I spell coo-roo-coo-coo-coo-coo-coo-coo right?

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18 Comments:

Blogger Mouse said...

Stomach growling is not nearly as bad as a ringing phone.

As for nose-picking, maybe keep tissues handy and try to intercept with one anytime she starts to dive in. We've been lucky on this one, but there are a couple boys in his gymnastics class whose mother has been bribing with the promise of treats if they can get through class without digging. It's worked for one, but not the other.

9:21 PM  
Blogger Amy U. said...

The other day I was taking an order at the restaurant and this little boy, with tiger stripes painted on his face, was digging for gold. NICE!

Maybe try asking her pointedly, "Cakes, do you need a Kleenex?"

Assertagirl

9:22 PM  
Blogger Mad Hatter said...

Our cell rang once at a play. My husband had it in his pocket. My husband was the director of the play. Oh my.

Hey, did you watch The Englishman's Boy on CBC on Sunday? What did you think? My husband refuses to listen to me talk about dick lit anymore. Apparently, I'm annoying.

9:56 PM  
Blogger nomotherearth said...

I'm no help - I think I traumatized the Boy with the nasal aspirator when he was young, so he leaves his nose alone. My cross to bear is thumb-sucking, it would seem. Oh, and potty training.

11:32 PM  
Blogger Ms. Porter said...

From my personal experience ignoring the booger hunt didn't work. I had to explain what boogers were and why we don't want to touch...well in our case it was EAT THEM!! grosssssss

11:35 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

Back in the day, I had a little cousin who tried to give me his boogers as presents. Needless to say, I didn't accept.

This is going to be random but... I had a friend show me a post from a pot lovers message board that went on and on about how nothing was wrong with eating boogers, that they actually are good for you somehow (don't remember how), and that the social stigma about it is ridiculous. It didn't convince me to place them on a plate and have them for dinner (though I guess we can assume what that guy snacks on when he's high), but I do think it's something we all do occasionally throughout life, and the fact that she's just discovering it probably means that it won't last too long. I like the advice mouse gave--keep tissues handy and swoop in when you notice the booger-play.

Also, to clarify, even though I just wrote quite a lot about boogers, I do think they're fairly gross.

P.S. Can't wait to see you at pub night! :)

11:55 PM  
Blogger sweets said...

oh no! i don't which is worse, the growling or the nose issue... LOL ok the nose picking is worse... yikes

5:50 AM  
Blogger Jer said...

Yea, my daughter does the nose picking as well (and have, perhaps, eaten some too). She's getting over it though (because i've been telling her it's gross). I know people in other cultures who do not think that it's half as gross as we think it is.

10:01 AM  
Blogger kgirl said...

i believe nose-picking is the national pasttime of the toddler set.

Take off, eh?

2:04 PM  
Blogger kittenpie said...

Well, telling her to stop hasn't worked for us, she just thinks it's an amusing challenge to keep at it when I take my hand away. Instead, so far I'm working on getting the product into a kleenex. Baby steps.

10:18 PM  
Blogger Lisa b said...

I cannot stand the nose picking.
My head almost explodes on my duty day at Ks nursery school.

6:23 PM  
Blogger b*babbler said...

Peanut *just* found her nose this past week. Finds it fascinating to jam her finger up there, but gets quite distressed when she actually finds something.

Hopefully a few boogers will dissuade her.

10:06 PM  
Blogger crazymumma said...

snort. funny.

I told my dad I could quit picking my nose ANYTIME!

he shoulda seen me trying to quit smoking years later.

bet her boogers are cute as hell tho.

10:33 PM  
Blogger highwaisted said...

boogers! hahahahahaaha hilarious. it is gross but whenever i see that it never bothers me. when i think of toddlers i think of nose picking... they go hand in hand

2:31 PM  
Blogger Denguy said...

I believe it's:

Coooo loo-coo-coo coo-coo-coo-coooo.

5:02 PM  
Blogger Mac and Cheese said...

I think that I've become desensitized to my daughter's nose-picking as it doesn't even strike me as gross anymore. Now the rude cell phone interruption is another story.

10:01 PM  
Blogger Mac and Cheese said...

I think that I've become desensitized to my daughter's nose-picking as it doesn't even strike me as gross anymore. Now the rude cell phone interruption is another story.

10:01 PM  
Blogger Holly said...

bob and doug eh? LMAO!

And, Flotsam and Jetsam - weren't they the 2 eels in The Little Mermaid? Can you tell I'm new to your blog? ;)

11:41 PM  

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